Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Im OK With It

Since August of 2007, I have been in a season of "Friend Loss".  It has been either a loss in friendship or a loss in the life of a friend, but truly since 2007, this has been a factor.  For whatever reasons, certain friendships have been cut off, discontinued, or dissolved-however way you want to put it- and in the case of death, I truly believe that we die by appointment rather than our conditions; so for those friends who have passed on, I Bless God for their lives and their friendship, but I miss them, so it's definitely a loss to Mee.  I also find that in this process, forgiveness has been preached a lot through various vessels of God, and although I have forgiven those that have offended Mee, for whatever reason some friendships I have chosen not to renew.
That said, I come at a crossroads because as I get older, I find that with Friends, there are certain things that are taboo.  If you have friends that are Married, it's taboo to ask them how they are doing in their marriage. Never mind the friendship, its just not something to do.  If you have Single friends, it's taboo to tell another friend what those friends has done or not done to you or for you over the years.  The messenger will always get it twisted and before you know it, your initial statement is not what you said. And please don't have any questions,comments or concerns as to why they always wear shades at social gatherings, or if they are happy, or why they always are broke and they got a "man".  Gone are the days of honesty-Good Blatant Honesty.  And gone are the days when people examine themselves, their motives, their ways and actions.  And with Social Media, people do not talk anymore.  The face to face is too difficult to handle- the phone rings too loudly to pick it up-"the voicemail can get it", and furthermore, you need to mind your business, if you were their REAL friend, you would standby and watch them be hurt, beat up, talked about, cheated on, misused, or the like.
These are my thoughts as I close the end of a conversation I had with someone who is Married and my inquiry of whether or not they were still married based on my unintended observations.  Like what? I'm glad you asked- like seeing them with people other than their spouses without even an inch between them-taking advantage that you are just seeing things you don't initially inquire.  But then it's seeing things over and over again, and it soon begins to make you wonder-especially if this person is your friend and has been for years.  So here I go, trusting that I can ask my friend anything because of my concern, and they get offended- I find myself at this point of once again, examining myself, and my motives.  Since I am only coming from a place of honesty and genuine concern- I'm OK with it. If they never speak to Mee again, kool- if they realize what I pointed out and still never speak to Mee again Kool, and by Mee apologizing for the offense, if they choose to forgive Mee and not be my friend anymore, I am OK with it.
Know that, if I am your friend, I will be honest with you. And I am coming from a place of Love and Genuine Concern in being your friend.    What's the point in 2 Adults lying to each other when neither one of them has a Heaven or Hell to put you in? A lot of people can't handle the Truth, but the Bible says The Truth shall make you Free and I am OK with it.

1 comment:

  1. I love this post! I too have lost friends, and sometimes they take themselves out of my life for whatever reason...and I'm ok with that (in your words:) I believe that not everyone deserves a front row seat in your life all the time. God takes people out of your life for a reason, which is why i never question the one's that eliminate themselves. Who knows what their motives were anyway...God, hence them eliminating themselvesL(

    Peace and Always Love,
    Team Baby Momma # 22
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